


Wednesday Night

by DarkAnsalong



Category: Free!
Genre: Established Relationship, Gender Dysphoria, Nonbinary Character, Other, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-26
Updated: 2014-05-26
Packaged: 2018-01-26 13:48:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1690526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkAnsalong/pseuds/DarkAnsalong
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rin Matsuoka has been dating Seijuurou Mikoshiba for four months now, and is really starting to take their relationship seriously. Suddenly, he’s faced with having to accept news that could potentially change (or, even worse, ruin) his entire relationship - that is, that Seijuurou’s gender is not what Rin had assumed it to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wednesday Night

**Author's Note:**

> Gosh okay I just… really wanted to write about nonbinary Seijuurou. That’s all this is. It’s Seijuurou x Rin (my Free! OTP) + nonbinary Seijuurou. I am trash. Goodbye. (please enjoy!!) (also idk how much it matters but if anyone is interested I am an agender nonbinary person! so yes)

They had been dating for about four months now - longer than any other relationship Rin could ever remember having. In fact, come to think of it, Seijuurou was probably the first serious relationship he could ever remember being in. There had been girls, and boys, who he had liked, and even “dated”, before this, but… not _really_. And certainly not for this long. And definitely not with a mindset that this could actually last.

 

And yeah, they fought like crazy. Seijuurou was stuck up and egotistical and Rin was pretty sure he thought the whole fucking world revolved around him. And he guessed it kind of did, at least at school, where being the award-winning, record-breaking captain of an all star swim team kind of meant a lot. And he guessed he wasn’t really much better - he had a tendency to be pretty stubborn too, admittedly.

 

But their fights, more often than not, were not bad, and usually ended with both of them feeling pretty shitty for fighting in the first place. So things were generally on the good side, and, honestly, Rin was pretty happy. He liked Seijuurou and he liked the feeling of actually being in a relationship, and, although he would likely never admit it to anyone, he really wanted to stay with him for… as long as possible, really.

 

Every wednesday night, when Rin had little homework and Seijuurou got off of work early, the two went out together. Usually it was just dinner, or sometimes to see a movie or walk in the park or something, although Seijuurou got bored at theatres quickly and Rin’s hand holding skills were subpar at best due to a terrible fear of public displays of affection. But still, simple as it was, it would be a lie to say Rin didn’t enjoy it, and even look forward to it.

 

And Seijuurou usually did too, which was what had Rin so worried tonight. He always came by after work, telling him what the plan was. Seijuurou was a better plan maker than Rin so he left that up to him. But with no visit or call a good half hour after he normally would show up, Rin was beyond antsy and not exactly sure what to do with himself.

 

The logical answer was to go knock on Seijuurou’s door and if he did not answer call him, but he was too nervous. Nitori was out tonight, working on homework with a friend apparently, so Rin was all alone, so it wasn’t like he had anyone to talk to. He guessed he could text his sister to vent, but he didn’t like pouring emotions out on her, and he wasn’t good at conveying thoughts through text. Actually, he wasn’t good at conveying thoughts period, but writing them out through his phone was especially difficult of a challenge for him.

 

So instead he waited pathetically on his bed, laying on his side and clutching his phone and staring pathetically at the wall. He was feeling somewhat hopeless at this point, and honestly, if his phone had not rung only moments later, he more likely than not would have spent all night like that.

 

“Hello?!” his voice was urgent and a lot more eager than he had meant for it to sound. Oh well.

 

“Hey, Matsuoka!” the unmistakable voice of his captain and boyfriend came from the phone, and Rin let out a little breath of relief, although there was still worry. That was Seijuurou alright, but he didn’t… sound… right. He sounded upset. “Sorry for, uh, not calling.”

 

Rin shook his head, only to remember that Seijuurou could not see such a gesture from the other end of the phone. “N- No, it’s fine. Is everything alright?” He furrowed his brow, holding his phone tighter as he felt that same anxiety from earlier pool in his stomach.

 

The silence that followed made Rin wonder if he was doing what he had just done, making some gesture that was invisible to him. After a moment, however, he heard the redhead clear his throat and reply, “Yeah. Yeah, I’m alright. Um…”

 

“Um?”

 

“Um, if you want, you could… come over…? I gotta talk to you about something.”

 

And then Rin was _really_ nervous. Because Seijuurou never said stuff like that. If he had to talk, he talked. He didn’t wait or put it off or sound so… upset. Rin took in a breath and nodded slowly. “Yeah. Are you, um… are you in your dorm?”

 

“What? Oh, no, I’m actually with my sister.”

 

Rin blinked, trying to add this new piece to the growing puzzle of confusion. “Your sister?” He did not know Seijuurou’s sister. In fact, Seijuurou only really mentioned her every now and then, and very briefly, and literally all he could remember about her from what he had heard was that she was Gou’s age, and had the same hair as her brother. “Where is she?”

 

“She’s in town with my parents. I can give you directions.”

 

And so he did. Rin had no idea what was going on. Part of him was beginning to calm down. He doubted Seijuurou was going to break up with him at his parent’s house. If he wanted to break up he would have confronted him directly. Was this some ploy to get him to meet his parents, maybe? He hadn’t yet, so perhaps that was it.

 

Throwing on some nicer clothing, Rin quickly left the school dorms.

 

xxx

 

A good half hour later, Rin was arriving at the address Seijuurou had given him. The house was nice, he thought, eyeing the building. It was on the larger, fancier side, and he vaguely remembered the rumors that went around Samezuka claiming that Seijuurou’s family was extremely well-off.

 

Nervousness spread through Rin yet again as he approached the house and rang the doorbell. There was a sound of voices speaking, and some rustling, and then the door was being opened by a young girl with shortish, fiery red hair. She blinked, eyed Rin for a moment, then smiled and opened the door.

 

“You’re Seijuurou’s boyfriend,” she noted immediately, dipping her head in greeting.

 

“Yeah, that’s right. Is he, um… around?” Rin was immediately reminded of his own sister. Which he thought made it sort of weird that Seijuurou had seemed so intent on dating her (at least, until they had gotten together). But then again, that may have just been his protective big brother side talking. This girl seemed sweet, though.

 

The girl nodded and left, running up the stairs and returning a moment later. “You, um…” She fidgeted, eyes wandering around as if she were searching for something, before saying, “You have to be really nice, okay?”

 

Rin blinked. “Nice?” he repeated, not understanding the request. “Sure, I can be nice.” He would be nice to Seijuurou. At least, as nice as he always was - which meant insults and teasing, but never in a hateful way. And Seijuurou understood that. Maybe his sister just didn’t. “Can you take me to your brother?”

 

Again, the girl nodded, and she turned and motioned for Rin to follow up the stairs. They made it to the upstairs room, where the door was shut, and she knocked on it. “Seijuu! Can we come in?”

 

A terribly long pause. Rin held his breath. The girl clicked her tongue impatiently. Then, a voice replied, “Yeah, let Rin in alone. We gotta talk, remember?”

 

The girl smiled briefly at Rin - was that an encouraging smile? - and turned, taking the first step down and motioning for Rin to continue on ahead without her. Rin muttered a soft thanks to the girl and entered the room, looking around.

 

One thing Rin was certain of immediately: This was his sister’s room. It was brightly colored, and filled with stuffed animals and a whole desk and mirror for applying makeup and storing makeup supplies. Some clothing lay scattered around on the ground, obvious girl clothing, including but not limited to skirts and bras.

 

And on the bed was Rin’s boyfriend. Who… didn’t quite look like his boyfriend. His hair was down, for one thing, and falling into his eyes in a way he wasn’t used to seeing. And he was currently wrapped in a blanket, clutching it close. A glance up to meet Rin’s eyes revealed that it seemed as though he had been messing with makeup. Not _putting it on_ , exactly, but toying with it and testing it out on himself. Rin blinked. Seijuurou blinked. Rin wasn’t sure if his face was redder than the other’s or not - Seijuurou’s was pretty red.

 

“We need to talk.”

 

Rin did his best to keep his tone normal, and not immediately ask why the hell he had been playing with mascara and hiding in his sister’s bedroom and blowing off tonight’s date. “Y- Yeah…” He wasn’t sure if that was meant to be a question or an agreement. Both, he guessed.

 

Seijuurou chuckled weakly. “So, um…” He clutched his blanket again and looked around the room as if searching for the words to say, just as his sister had. “I guess I kinda lied to you.”

 

“Lied to me,” Rin repeated, feeling light headed. He was pretty sure he had had something else to add to that, but he couldn’t quite remember what it had been.

 

Luckily, Seijuurou continued, so he did not have to. “Yeah, uh… I guess I’m not your boyfriend.” And then, the moment he realized how these words sounded, he quickly added, “I mean, not your _boy_ friend.” The new emphasis made Rin’s eyebrows twitch and he glanced to the eyeliner around those pretty golden eyes of his.

 

“Yeah…?”

 

Seijuurou chuckled weakly, and it sounded a little like he was going to cry. “I mean… I mean I’m not… a boy. So I can’t be your… boy… friend.” Rin had never in his life heard Seijuurou be so very bad at words before. Rin nodded with encouragement, silently pleading the other to continue. “B- But I’m not a girl either though!”

 

What had meant to come out as a way to ease Rin’s worries only made them grow. He groaned, frustrated with himself, with Seijuurou, with this whole situation, and asked, “What the hell does that mean, Mikoshiba?” Seijuurou flinched, which Rin hadn’t been expecting. And then Rin was feeling terrible. He swallowed.

 

Seijuurou stuttered more than ever as he tried to weakly explain, “I mean I’m… neither. Or, well both…? I think I’m… sort of both…” The lack of expression on Rin’s face seemed to scare the swim captain, and he searched around for words the right again and said, “Rin, so… so you know what it means to be transgender right?” He was speaking fast now, as if wanting to get all of this over with.

 

Rin nodded slowly. “Yeah, I do.” Was Seijuurou trans? He had just said he wasn’t a girl, though. Or a boy. He had said he was both. What did that mean?”

 

“I- It’s like that.” Seijuurou attempted to explain. “But not, like… I’m a girl. I’m not a girl and I’m not a boy. _Not entirely_.”

 

Rin thought this over for a long time. After a moment, he realized that all decent questions and comments had left his mind, and he was left with, “So why are you here.” It came out more accusatory than he had meant it to and he cursed his inability to convey thoughts correctly.

 

Seijuurou took a deep breath. He continued to speak at a rather quick pace as he replied, “Because on some days I feel really fucking bad and my sister keeps things for me that I can’t keep in my dorm because if I keep girly shit in my dorm at the very least I might be laughed at or if they hear I’m not a boy I could be kicked off of the team or out of the school.”

 

_That’s right_ , Rin realized, eyes widening. Samezuka was an all boys academy. If Seijuurou wasn’t… a boy… then he couldn’t stay, could he? “S- So…”

 

“I’m not lying to stay in school, though,” he promised suddenly, as if reading his mind. “I mean, I’m not always not a boy. I’m… I said I was both, remember? And at times where I… feel okay as a boy, it’s fine.” He smiled to prove his point, but the current state he was in did not contribute well to this. “It’s just… sometimes I really… am not a boy and… at those times I feel… really bad… about… my body…? A- And I’ve been trying really hard not to let that happen on nights when we’re dating so we can… y’know, date. But then tonight at work these people…” He trailed off, showing that he very much did not want to elaborate on what had happened at work with “these people.”

 

Rin tried to understand this. So it was like being transgender. He did not entirely understand, to be honest. Attempting to make sense of things, he said, “So… so what, you felt bad about yourself and went to see your sister?”

 

Seijuurou nodded. “She’s one of the only people that knows.” he explained. “She keeps stuff here. Like, that skirt I put on earlier. That stuff is in my size, not hers.” Rin vaguely remembered the skirt that had been lying on the ground. “Bu- But, I mean, that stuff doesn’t, like, make it go away altogether, and… and I guess I also just wanted to, um…” He was hesitating, and Rin for the life of him could not figure out why. He couldn’t figure out anything, to be perfectly honest. “I guess I just like being around someone who will listen and let me complain or cry until I feel okay.”

 

And words that left Rin’s mouth next even he had not been expecting to hear, “Well, you can do that shit with me if you want.” Seijuurou seemed just as surprised as Rin to hear these words, and he let go of his blanket, letting it fall around his shoulders now. “I mean… you just told me everything, didn’t you? So if you wanted to you could… spare yourself the whole trip over here and just… walk across the hallway to my dorm. Or stay in your dorm and I could go over there if you wanted to make sure Ai wasn’t in the room.”

 

“But… but my stuff…” Seijuurou glanced around at the scattered items. Rin suddenly felt bad for using them as proof of this being a girl’s room. “I have to come over here because she keeps all my stuff for me so I don’t have to try to hide it at Samezuka, remember…?”

 

Rin nodded. “Yeah, but… you could… you could just bring _some of it_ , right? And… I could hide it for you, if you wanted to… decrease the chance of being caught…” And then his eyes lit up and he added, “If I was caught I could say I was keeping it for Gou. She visits a lot, so it would make sense.” He rolled his eyes.

 

Seijuurou had a new look on his face. He looked hopeful, actually. He nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, that would make sense. You could hang onto my stuff and… come over…” He swallowed thickly and eyed Rin suddenly as if he’d never seen him before. “So you would… still want to date me…?”

 

That possibility hadn’t even occurred to Rin, to be honest. In fact, he was having a hard time seeing Seijuurou any differently. Which may have been a bad thing in hindsight. But it was all difficult to get used to, and thus far he was not feeling like anything was particularly different between the two of them, regardless of Seijuurou’s gender. “Yeah, I’d still date you. I was stupid enough to go out with you in the first place, wasn’t I? I don’t see how this changes much.”

 

Seijuurou laughed at this. “I sure as hell hope you aren’t thinking that you being accepting means I owe you, though. You’re working just as hard as ever in the pool tomorrow and I fully intend to absolutely destroy you in our practice race on Friday.”

 

Rin felt his cheeks redden and he walked over to the other redhead, sitting down on the bed beside him. “Maybe I’ll just go easy on you, to be polite. You know, since you’re part girl.” He didn’t get a chance to smirk before he was being shoved over onto his side and pinned there, his face against the bed.

 

“Fuck you.”

 

There was a brief moment where Rin actually worried he had offended the other, and he began formulating an apology, before he heard the captain laugh loudly and he was tugged back up by the shoulder. Rin blushed terribly. “Fuck _you_. Don’t push me around like that.”

 

“Don’t be a sexist ass.” Seijuurou grinned. “Besides, going easy on me would just make things even more embarrassing for you. You already lost by a good forty seconds last time, and I’m pretty damn sure you were giving it all you had.”

 

Rin found himself grinning in spite of himself. Seijuurou was Seijuurou. And now Seijuurou had a friend - more than that, a _boyfriend_ \- in the school who he could come to next time he was feeling dysphoric. And they were still dating and happy together.

 

Seijuurou seemed capable of reading these thoughts, or perhaps they were written all over Rin’s grin, because he laughed again and leaned in, grabbing Rin in a tight hug. He buried his face into Rin’s shoulder and hummed happily, and after a moment, murmured, “Oh, yeah, and Matsuoka, one more thing.”

 

Rin’s voice sounded pathetically blissful as he replied with, “Hm?”

 

“I still top.”


End file.
